On being nice to each other…

It has been another tumultuous month in the world arena. All the usual suspects, our lovely Ahmedinajed,

ahmadinejad 2

the Russians,


The Chinese…

the war lords of Afghanistan/Pakistan

Al qaeda Osama bin Laden 1

and North Koreans have been hard at work making sure that millions upon millions of people (actually I guess, billions) are kept unhappy.

And their proud of it too!

They come to us on the television, on the papers and other popular media channels praising their self-righteousness and the glory of their perspective oppressive regimes.

It should be a shameful activity, they should cower in the face of the other 5 billion of us, all sneering and laughing at the way the treat their people but they don’t, and it is because we are all complicit.

They don’t hide for two major reasons, one of which is Marco in level and the other of which is Micro. The Macro level is obvious and we read about it often, some examples are given below,

‘We are pandering to the Oil wealth of these gangsters’,

‘China is the world’s factory and we are all happy to consume cheap goods off them no matter what the internal costs are to them or the environment’,

‘Nations have a right to self governance and we should not interfere with other countries’


But I am more interested in the Mirco level effects, the effects that I see everyday all around me, and that is:

People are nasty to each other


often the threat of perceived violence is all that keeps our actions in order.

I’m talking about nastiness between loving couples, fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, the traffic police and drivers, government officials and citizens, teachers and their students, Bosses and employees, Judges and criminals and basically every kind of distinct group that can be thought about between humans and themselves. I am even talking about the nastiness one has with oneself.

Now, I’ve been thinking this for a while and questioning my own perceptions.

Is it that I am being negative?

What about all the love?


What about looking at the bright side of things?

but the more I think about it the more I realize that this is exactly what is going on.

The brightest thing to do is to acknowledge the problem…

Nastiness is so prevalent that we have become desensitized to it, just like people who live next to train tracks for a long times don’t hear the trains that pass by them.

It takes a little bit of extended patience  to become aware of the situation but then both the logic and the utter omnipresence of the phenomenon takes you by surprise. Each place and each situation has its own form of oppression, each family its own method of control, each organization its own structure. The whole thing is unpalatable, and I would like you to see it with me….

I don’t expect you to accept what I am writing immediately. It takes time to notice the pattern of control people have on each other and for that matter you have on yourself but the fact of it is certain.

Nastiness comes in so many forms that it seems impossible to categorize the phenomenon into a coherent idea. But the basic flavour of the animal is that action is taken by one entity on another with the intention to impede the other.

The action can be physical, psychological, implied, indirect or any other thing you can imagine. The intended effect can be equally arbitary as long as it has the effect of slowing the other. And one of the best ways of slowing someone is to hit their self esteem.

It is highly possible that we have evolved into this predicament through Darwinian processes. What better way is there to make sure that your genetic competitor doesn’t get ahead that making sure they are operating at less than efficient norms.

I would like to see some real scientific evidence to this assertion some day, however more important than that is this is…

How are we to get out of it?

Our great and hypocritical friend J.Krishnamurti asked a similar question. I assume that he never found the answer, or gave up trying….

So, How do we find the answer?

I have an answer but that will come in  a following blog.

does anyone have a comment?

2 thoughts on “On being nice to each other…

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